bangers and mash?

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Why did the old lady talk to a tree? She had Alzheimer's and was going to die.

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why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your mom. Just kidding, it's the pizza guy. Pizza guy who?

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Violence is never the answer, its the question... The answer is YES!

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

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(To the pretty girl at the bar) "Was your father a thief? Because I really would like to have sexual intercourse with you."

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Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

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What's worse than stepping on a piece of gum? A clown following you around all day throwing toothbrushes at you. ___ Zertop™

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What's worse than a wet sock? Being molested as a child.

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what did the anorexic girl eat today? nothing..

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a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

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A man and his friend walk into a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H2O." The second man, quite thirsty, says "I would like some H2O too." The second man dies because the bartender is a serial killer and gave the man the hydrogen peroxide he ordered. The first man is killed with a shovel.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your ball sack ripped off with a grapple hook

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you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

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Did you know Helen Keller has a pool? no oh well she does.

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Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

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What's big fat and hairy? Peter

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A horse walks into a bar and Shits John Taffer is Pissed

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Q: Why shouldn't you walk under a ladder? A: Because it could fall on top of you. Be a reasonable human being and just fly OVER the ladder.

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Knock Knock Nobody Nobody who? Nobody, did you not hear what I just said.

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I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

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How do you make a French-man cry? Kill his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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