What do you call Metta World Peace after he has hit somebody? Metta World War.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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What's worse than losing the remote? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

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why did the computer monitor stop working? Becasue it has a date with a slice of cheese.

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Gordon Brown smiles.

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chuck norris multiplied by zero equals zero.

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Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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Why did the boy lose his change? He had no Pants Why did the boy have no pants? The Holocaust

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What's black and white and red all over? The Nazi Flag in WW II

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What does a duck have in common? The further it flies the more.

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Have you seen the flock of birds? probably not because they hit a window and all died at impact.

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Q: Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? A: A burglar

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In the movie "Sherlock Holmes". Why is Sherlock Holmes gay???? Because he was chasing "Blackwood".

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Roses are c0ck violets are vag this joke is for george i like it like that<3xxxx

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What did the cow say to the farmer who was driving by in a tractor? MOOOOOOOO!

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I used to say "I used to be an adventurer like you but then I took an arrow to the knee" like you but then I took an arrow in the knee.

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What did I wake upto this morning that was white , cold and 2 inches deep? My tiny flaccid penis.

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"I'm so hungry!" "Hello so hungry, I am Matt. You must come from a very odd family if your name is " so hungry"!

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A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

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Your mama's so stupid that i wouldn't be surprised if you were to tell me that she didn't graduate high school.

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You die of loss of blood, under a pile of first-aid kits

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Man 1: my wife has lovley perfume. She smells like a peppermint cream. Man 2: Yeah, I know, I spent eight hours shagging her last night.

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Do the roar!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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