there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

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Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

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Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

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How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

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Why couldn't the little seven year old girl paint her finger nails? She fell in front of a train.

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What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

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A ginger man ascends to heaven and reaches the pearly gates, seconds later he wakes up in a hospital bed and realizes it was merely a near death hallucination and God isn't real.

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? ... Well, do you know or not?

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Christ is a conspiracy

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Two Chav's jump off a cliff who wins? Neither, the affects of gravity are equal despite the weight of said object.

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What do people call the completely paralyzed man with no eyes? David, his name.

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how many people were on the bus........ 0 cause the bus was parked for 45 years

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What can I get for ya?" The man replies, "A beer."

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What did the physicist say when he got his penis stuck in a test tube? Ah jeesh! I got my penis stuck in a test tube.

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how many poeple does it take to change a light bulb? you spelled people wrong.

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Why did James drop his ice-cream? He was mourning the loss of his mother to terminal illness so he threw himself in front of a train.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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why did sally fall off a swing she had no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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What do you call a calculator without a brain? A calculator.

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9/11

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What did the hooker say to the black guy? How long do you want it for?

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Why was i sad when 4 black people in a cadillac fell over a cliff. The car blew up...

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Little Johnny walked into class one day. The teacher announced their would be a pop-quiz on the declaration of independence. Johnny passed. (ic3)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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