A man was mowing the lawn. The mower stops, so he look to see if something stuck in the blades. What did he pull out? Nothing, the gas ran out.

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Knock Knock. Erm, sorry to be weird, but can you perhaps use the doorbell, because it's new and has a novelty chime. I'm proud of it and get a little chuckle everytime it rings in the vain hope that, perhaps you, the visitor, may also find it entertaining. Who's there anyway?'

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How many dead babies can you fit inside Casey Anthony's trunk? Trick question. She didn't do it.

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speacking of cheese... steve jobs died

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Chickens are not smart enough to open a gate and avoid traffic at the same time!

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Knock knock Who's there Why? Why who? Why so serious?

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A black man is running down the street with a purse in his hand. He was trying to catch up to the old woman who forgot it at the restaurant. She was very grateful.

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Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

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why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black person on a bike? Its probably your bike.

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Sam slept and never woke up again.. Because he followed his dream.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His family was being held hostage on the other side.

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What's Hitler's favorite drink? Jews (meaning juice)

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Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

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Q:Why is rugby one of the safest sports to play? A: It isn't , it is in fact very dangerous.

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Q: what do you call a mushy green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

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How do you stop R Kelly from peeing on little girls? Kill all little girls.

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What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

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What do a turtle and a bowling ball have in common? Nothing

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Why couldnt rex bark??? because he was a fish!

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops