Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homosexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual pandas just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homosexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

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What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo. Moral: Cuckoo!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in every apple.

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What's red and bad for your teeth A brick

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Do you know the difference between a dinosaur and a slice of bread? No. You're pretty stupid then.

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

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Whats pink and silver and runs into walls? A baby with forks in its eyes. Whats green and silver and sits in a corner? The same baby three weeks later.

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Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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What did the man dying of cancer want for his birthday? To live.

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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Why cant stevie wonder read? Because he is blind

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Your mom is so stupid she has trouble holding a steady job and struggles to support her family.

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How do you make a mime cry? Hit him with an axe

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Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

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A man goes to his doctor and says, "Help me, my wife thinks she's a chicken." The doctor recommends a nearby psychiatrist to analyze the wife's mental instability, and inevitably she is housed in an insane asylum. The husband commits suicide.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who is there? Not Suzie

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knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

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What's worse than World War II? World War III.

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Why did the bones cross the street? They didn't. The dogs ate them.

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Help! I've fallen and I can't get up.

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one time, there was this anti-joke.com joke set-up. It was just like a normal joke set-up. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

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A pirate walks into a doctors office with ship's wheel attached to his crotch. Pirate: "Arrrrrr, do ya accept Kaiser Permanente?" Doctor: "Yes, but there's a $20 co-pay."

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Me:Oh wait, I got a joke! Friends:Oh boy, what is it? Tell us! Me:..my grandma died.. *Everyones silent* Some random guy:Oh haha, I get it! Me:Shut up, you have no friends. Some random guy: Oh........

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What did the dog say to the Jewish Rabbi? Bark

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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