What is the difference between a black person and a bicycle? You can sell a bicycle legally.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? You shouldn't call him anything. He needs help. -Tag

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Dick Cheney That's the joke

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What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

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Yes

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Yo mamma's so fat she attracts other matter with a force proportional to the product of their masses divided by the square of the distance.

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Apple hates Blackberry.

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Emily Scarpello...Fat Couch

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how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

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woman's rights

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was struck by lightning and died.

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How do you get into USA from mexico? Climb a fence

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It was Jimmy's 18th bday so his parents let him have the house to himself. He ate shrooms, fucked his turtle, then had his dick bitten off.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

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I like that, yet I wonder if our subconscious knows what it is what we seek, maybe we need to tell ourselves that we will find happiness, and then the mind leads us there.

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Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

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You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

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If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

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Your mother sleeps around so much that I worry that she may be taking too much medicine for her insomnia.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why can't a chicken cross a road without it being questioned?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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