Roses are Red Violets are Blue Violets are not blue They are Violet

Why do we have brown eggs? Because black people have sex with chickens

What do a blonde and a good beer have in common? They both go down easy.

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

Hey dude when is 4th of July? I don't know.

N-E Pats never cheated

A woman walks up to a man in a supermarket and asks him where she can find the potatos. He says "I think they are all the way at the end on aisle 3" "Thanks" she says. Then she gets to aisle 3, and there aint no potatos!!!!

Why did the Cookie Monster go to the Doctor? Because He had an inoperable tumor in his lower intestinal tract.

Why was the man like a chimp? Because they are 96% genetically identical.

Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

Q:How do you kill Chuck Norris ? A:You don't , He kills you first.

To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side

What do you do when you find a black guy bleeding on your porch? You should call an ambulance! This man is hurt!

Billy and Joseph are playing Rock paper scissors. Billy says paper. Joseph proceeds to throw a rock as hard as he can at Billys face and sends him to the emergency room where he was later diagnosed with terminal testicular cancer.

A baby walks into a bar, not long before it leaves out of the bar.

what happens when u fall down the stairs? you break your arm.

girl. have you seen my duck man. yes he is with me right now girl rely you have him man. yes in my diner girl. d.i.c.k. man.f u

What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? Well, contrary to popular belief, it is NOT Master Pain's (Betty's) "butt". You would most likely get a bungee jumping owl.

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender said "why the long face?" The horse then panicked, and feeling threatened, it kicked the bartender with its hind legs and galloped out of the bar. A civilian took immediate control of the situation and dialed the number for animal control, who arrived shortly and tranquilized the deer and put it back in its natural habitat. Don't worry, that didn't actually happen

Give one reason for not visiting a hotel. Basil Fawlty is the manager.

How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

A man walks into a bar. Since he was only moving at a slow walking pace, he was fine, no further events worth noting occured.

knock knock whos there I AM YOUR MOTHER!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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