A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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Knock, knock. Whose there? A Mountain Lion wait...what

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Knock knock. Who's there? Three months to live. Three months to live who? The C-Scan showed a massive, inoperable tumor in your brain that's been developing for years. You have only three months to live.

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Why did the boy climb the tree? To get to the top. - Driiiftz

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Whats more fun that a hooker - her mother

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What has four legs and is always ready to travel? Siamese twin fugitives.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Oh my gosh a talking muffin.

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Why couldn't the little kid get to sleep? His dog was on fire

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Why did the blond woman throw a clock out the window? She was going through a bitter divorce, and didn't want her ex-husband's things in her house anymore.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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what smells like tuna? my underwear

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Why was the chocolate black? It's not black you idiot, its white

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Q: How did the black guy die? A: After a long battle with a terrible case of pneumonia he struggled to breath and died a slow and peaceful death... R.I.P. Dad

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? A comment saying "I don't think that's an anti-joke"

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How do you know when a blonde has been using your computer? If you're lucky some of his or hair will have fallen out and be left on the keyboard as evidence.

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What was wrong with the man watching a black and white television program? He wasn't watching a black and white television program at all-he actually had color blindness.

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What do you call a black guy in a Walmart? A customer. You prejudice dullard!

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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A man travels to the park, and kills a person, throws them in a bag and runs away. He then travels to the grocery store, kills 2 people, throws them in a bag and walks away. He then travels to the gas station, kills 3 people and walks away. He keeps traveling around killing people until he has claimed 69 victims in all. From this, we can infer that he was a psychotic murderer with a perverted sense of humor.

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So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

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Q: Whats black and green and goes 100 mph? A: A black and white car going 100 mph.

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Q: When is a door not a door? A: Before it has been asembled or after it has been taken down and no longer maintains the physical form of that which a door typically has.

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What's just not right? Left

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What did one alien say to another alien? I miss Mexico.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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