this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

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What did the irishman say when he walked into a bar? Ouch

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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How many blondes does it take to change a diaper? About a thousand

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Whats the difference between a black man and a mexican? The skin pigmentation and most likely the size of their penis

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What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

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What do you call a german soldier? A Nazi

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

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"is it just me or is it getting really hot in here?" "the house is on fire and we are locked in"

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RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

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roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, some dont

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What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings. Now hats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Three bee stings.

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Q: What is usually black , is a rectangle and has two circles? A: An i pod touch 4

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How do you make a plumber cry You kill it's family

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartendor says "Why the long face?" The horse replies "My wife was just diagnosed with cancer and given only a week to live."

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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A Black man, a Latino, and a Midget get into a car. They drive to the county fair, get snow cones and ride the tilt-a-whirl.

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My Texting Convos: "Heyy!" "Hi!" "Watz up?" "nm hbu?" "Same here!" "Koolio!(: So wrud?" "Nothing. Just texting you!" "Yea! Same! I'm so bored! And tired!" "Ikr!" "Yupp!" *No one answers. When this is what you really want: "I love you soooo much!" "Awwwwh!<3 I loe you too!" "Do you wanna go out?(;" "YES!!(:" "ily<3" "iyl2<3" *convo goes on forever(: Moral: Purple tomatoes are books of yellow buttons on hands(;

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What is the only non-racist animal? The mexican panda. Why? It's black, white, hispanic, and asian.

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What did the black man drink on a hot summer day? Some water, it quickly replenished the liquids he was perspiring do to the temperature being sufficiently hotter than his body temperature

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Joe is a negotiator. When joe sees someone in trouble, he tries to help them out of it by talking. Joe failed to talk to Osama bin laden correctly. Joe is no longer living in this world. Joe drank his sorrows away and died from the alcohol in his body. Osama is completely unrelated to this, his family died in a car crash.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops