Why did the fat guy survive the the plane crash? He was late to get up due to a malfunctioning alarm clock and so missed his flight, sparing him of the tragic outcome the other passengers suffered. To this day he still thinks about how a completely random occurrence saved his life.

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Why does Larry the Cable Guy get his own T.V. show??? Why can't I have one of my own??? .......ah...forgot....I'm a minority...

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What did the man say after jumping into a well? He didn't say anything because he died instantly after jumping head first into a dry, 20 foot well. His family mourned for three days.

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why does david stutter during meetings. because he smiles till his cheeks hurt

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What's black and Has 8 legs? Gang Rape.

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If you have a stroke, call 000

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Whats worse than your roof caving in on you? Being stabbed by yard gnomes.

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someone called someone else a frog

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Why was the Mexican lucky to have a job? Due to the failing economy, lack of available jobs, and amount of people getting laid off, it was considered lucky to have a job.

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

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whats the strongest muscle the man who can't talk has. definatly not his mouth

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nolan is gay

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Patient: "Doctor, my arm hurts when I poke it with my index finger." Doctor: "That's because your finger is broken."

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Why are all the other numbers scared of 7? Beacuse 7 stabbed his mother with a steak knife.

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what is the coolest thing in the world? hashtag swagbag yolo

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Why didn't the guy have kids? He didn't want them

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Why is my penis rainbow colored?

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I think my son might be gay. He's started to listen to Justin Bieber, and last week I walked in on him engaging in penetrative anal sex with one of his friends.

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Yo Momma is SO FAT, THAT she has an increased risk of cardiac arrest due to her blood pressure.

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Why did the man yell at his wall? Because it jumped out and scared him when he walked past

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? Because he got hit by a bus.

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Your mumma's so ugly. Period.

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You walk into a shopping centre, what wont you see? Madelin McCann.

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ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ now I know my ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ no I know my ABC etc:

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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