What's like a whale and has a sprained leg? MATT ROSS THE FAT ARSE!!!!

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Why did the chicken die? Because it was crossing a busy road.

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So a plane flies into a world trade centre... That's not funny

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So theres a man, a horse, and a piglet in a helicopter. Upon noticing this, the pilot jumps out of the plane and the animals go crashing to their doom.

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Why did the jew ask for $10 back after he lent a boy $2? Because of inflation

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a gun Get in the van

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Whats white and sticky? Marshmellows

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What do you get when you run from Long Island to New Mexico? Tired.

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Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability

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- Why the black people smell? - To let even the blind person hate them.

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A man walks into a bar He wakes up from his coma 21 years later and learns that humans now serve pumpkins as gods.

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What did the kid say when the doctor said he had cancer Oh No

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. -It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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Chuck Norris was the leading role in the television show Walker, Texas Ranger.

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What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

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What do a fish and an eagle have in common? They both live underwater aside from the eagle.

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Why did the person name her OC telephone? I have no idea, please let me know why.

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How did the fireman get to the police station? He massacred his wife and children.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no reason. Chickens don't have the thinking skills to reason.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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What's the difference between acne and Michael Jackson? One is a an unsightly blemish that appears on your skin and the other is a dead pop singer.

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How many babies can you breast feed? 2

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my name is cartman, kyle you're a jew

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Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops