Why was the baby crying? Because he was tied to a railroad track. How did the baby die? He had a bomb strapped to him. How did the bomb explode? It got ran over by a train.

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Why did thomas make a big mess on the ground? Beacuse he fell of a cliff

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Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

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New Name for Jersey Shore: American Whorer Story

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What do you get when you put a blue bucket in the red sea? it gets wet

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A jewish man walks into a bar, has a drink, and goes home to his wife.

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A family walks into a talent agent's office. They do a cute family-friendly performance that they call "The Aristocrats."

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Ben." Ben who?" "Ben Dover!" "Ben,it's been 7 years. I already moved on and have a new husband and family. Stop coming here or I'm calling the police."

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What happens when a man goes to college? He gets a degree and graduates most of the time or he fails miserably.

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why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

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A police man pulls over a blonde for speeding. The policeman tells her she was speeding and starts to write a ticket. She get emotional and begins to cry. He writes the ticket, she signs it, and she drives off.

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Your momma's so fat that she should really be concerned for her health and seek professional help to manage her weight.

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i hate this glue. give me one new or i will poo.

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Roses are Red Violets are blue I am an onlince predator Post your address in the comment EJ

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What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? You aren't married to a girlfriend.

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Why was the black family eating KFC? Because KFC tastes very nice and there was a discount on the family bucket.

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Why did Sally fall off her swing? -she had no arms knock knock whos there not Sally

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Red." "Red who?" "Red any good books lately?" Suddenly, the séance lost credibility.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was suicidal.

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If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

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What's the difference between a Obama and a drug-dealer? I don't know what? I don't know, I was asking if you know...

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Whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bag? 1 dead baby in 10 bags

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What's red and shiny? Not the holocaust

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops