Why don't flowers bite you when you pick them? Cuz they don't have a brain.

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A black man and a Mexican man are in the back of a car. Who's driving? Not enough information to answer this question.

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What's the difference between white and black? White is Caucasian and black is African-American.

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Your mother is so fat that I would call her quite fat indeed.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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How can you tell if someones gay? You ask them.

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Yo' mama's so fat she has type 2 diabetes.

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What did the man say when he saw Niagra falls? Nothing, he was blind.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.... Knock, Knock, Who's there?: Not Sarah

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs falling skydiving? Jon, because that's his name.

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An SQL query walks into a bar, sees two tables and asks if it can join them.

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Why was the baby crying? He saw a nigga

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What do you call a newborn son? The proudest moment of your life. What do you call a newborn daughter? A disappointment.

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roses are red violets are blue the thing in the toilet reminds me of you :)

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What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

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Billy wanted a toy for Christmas. Sadly, Billy died before Christmas.

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run farther?

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Why was the man with one leg good at balancing on one foot? He used crutches.

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why did the mans alarm clock go off at six am? he has a high paid job he doesnt want to let down.

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drugs sex and alchohole are yumme as AIDS

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The man and the women were doing something. What are you looking? They just talked

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Why did the orange put on the sun block? Because it was afraid of turning into a TAN-gerine!

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Why did the blond girl walk into the street pole? Because she wasn't paying attention.

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What did the pear tree say to the farmer? Go harvest that corn over yonder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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