"This is Jesus Christ to Tim Tebow. Please leave me alone. Don't you know that my day off, is Sunday?"

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What is similar between the Holocaust and soccer? They both suck.

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Whats funnier than 1 dead baby? 2 Dead babies

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Why did you cross the road. You didn't your looking at this joke

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What happened to the boy with no family? He died in a tragic car accident along with his family

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Why is my son hungry? Because he didn't eat lunch.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf or bread. why did the plane fall apart in mid air? The engineer was a loaf of bread Why didn't the plane take off? because it was delayed.

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Intercom:ALERT! THERES AND EXTREIMEST IS THE SCHOOL! Little kid: Sir, can I borrow that towel on your head? BOOOOOOM!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to escape the evil villains in giant mech suits.

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I would tell you a joke about a blunt pencil but it's pointless

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My zombie busting team: Tank: The Terminator Mechanic: Tony Stark Demolitions: Superman Medic: Gandalf Bait: Justin Bieber

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What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? The extinction of the human species.

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What's big fat and hairy? Peter

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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What did the pirate say when his parrot died? Nothing. He was upset and didn't really feel like talking.

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Why couldn't the black man swim? He has no legs.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Enough.

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Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

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Why did Isaac run from his mother? She tried to kill him because God said so. Christianity.

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Why couldn't the Muslim eat pork? He didn't have a tongue.

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Why did Kelsey run out of eggs? Horses don't have much sperm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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