Two fish are sitting in a tank. One says, "I'll man the guns. You drive."

What kind of key can unlock a banana? Basically any key that is sharp enough.

what is the difference between Rick Perry and Lindsay Lohan? it only takes Lindsay 4 1/2 hours to finish a sentance.

What does Santa give to a naughty child who wants coal for Christmas? Nothing, Santa doesn't exist.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Nothing.

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven drove two planes into the world trade center.

Under Chuck Norris' beard, there is a chin.

How do a jew, an African, and u white man stop a train? They pull the breaks

What do you call a black guy that drives an airplane? A pilot.

What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

Why did the man kill the hamster? To get to the other side.

What did the fly say to the spider? Please, I have a wife and daughter.

How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis

What did the one Brick say to the other Brick? We have the same name.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I dont really care anymore BECAUSE I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CLICHE!

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

Q. What did the dead man do after he died? A. Nothing. He's dead.

What's the difference between a chicken? One leg is both the same

What did Ben's Graandma get him for Christmas? Nothing, she died on Thanksgiving!

What do you call a black man sitting on a porch? Relaxed.

So Nero, do we tell people your comments are all containing codes and stuff so we can stay in touch?

"This is Jesus Christ to Tim Tebow. Please leave me alone. Don't you know that my day off, is Sunday?"

What is similar between the Holocaust and soccer? They both suck.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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