Why won't Santa be delivering presents this year? Because he can't be bothered.

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What did the homosexual get for Christmas off his boyfriend? A lovely present off his loving partner.

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How do you earn a bunch of money all at once? Walk into Hot Topic and say "I have knives for sale!"

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Whats green and has wheels? A green car.

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vatalk you are retarded!!!!!

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What do you call a white guy sitting on a bench? The NBA.

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What do you call a black man that likes potatoes? Whatever his name is.

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Roses are red violets are blue vodka cost less than dinner for two

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What the flower say to the bird. Nothing

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What's Blue And Fat? A Brick. I like to lie a lot.

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Q: Whats the best part of a bald pussy? A: After you put the diaper back on you perv!

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Why was the man with one leg good at balancing on one foot? He used crutches.

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whats worst than finding a worm in your apple???? an apple in your worm.

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Science fact: what would happen if you lined up all the veins in your body? You would die.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It didn't.

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knock knock. who's there? no one. no one who? no one who?

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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A blonde drank an entire fruit smoothie in one sitting. She got a brain freeze.

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you know whats worse than cantaloupe? no cantaloupe

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a guy named bob likes sprinkles on his ice cream.

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why wouldnt you come to the dark side? i spit in the cookies

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What is the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same.

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What did the tree say to the kite? She got hit by a fridge.

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Your sex life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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