Q: If a Hungarian boy grows up to be a very successful payroll manager and learns to love and hate, show compassion while firing someone, and how to re-image the entire white house's security system, how many pickles are in the doghouse? A: 17

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What did one cow say to the other cow? Nothing. Cows do not possess the ability to speak.

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I SAID I WANT A GLASS OF JUICE. NOT I WANT TO GAS THE JEWS!-hitler

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What did batman say to robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

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Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

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What the difference between a rabbit an a eagle? They both fly except for the rabbit

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A pengiuin walked into a bar. Just kidding, it waddled at an increasingly fast rate.

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PENIS

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Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? Because you touch yourself at night.

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How did Doris respond to Uncle Monty's innapropriate chewing of her nose, ears and eyelids? She cut his head off, placed it an a saucepan, boiled and seasoned it, and then sold it to the middle east. The middle east were very grateful, and sent Doris a camel's penis as a thankyou gift.

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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Q: Why was Luigi sad? A: Because he entered the Twilight Zone.

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knock knock? who's there? ivan ivan who? ivan. i want you to apologize for tooking their jobs the other day i said ivan who? i dont have a middle or last name

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Knock knock Who's there A girl scout A girl scout who? A girl scout trying to sell cookies to support her alcoholic parents who beat her

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Knock knock Who's there. Interrupting cow, sorry you can see where this is going, just let me in without asking any more questions please.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side XD

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Why are apathy,ignorance, and resentment alike? I dont know and I don't care to know.

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a guy fell off a roof of a mansion he died his family cried F.Y.I i have Alzheimers toilet monster

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I f**ked your mom last night. Will you marry me?

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were you expecting a joke

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DEAD ON KANE ITS BEEN ALL YOU ABD CAOIMHIN

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Cody went to the store. Big Floppy Donkey Dick.

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why was six afraid of seven? Because seven brutally murdered six's family

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What's 100 times worse that finding an worm in your Apple listening to Justin B. Sing! :-)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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