What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn.

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Doctor: I'm sorry about your disease, young man. It looks like your time is up. Man: NO! How much time to I have? Doctor: Five. Man: Five years? Five months? Five weeks? Doctor: Four... Three...

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have alzheimers, cheese on toast.

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What do you call a woman who is addicted to crack, has a light mustache and huge saggy tits, has had 4 kids with 4 different fathers and makes her living giving hand-jobs behind the bus station? Mom.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the engine wasnt working.

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Why was the black man hanging from the tree? He fell and had to grab a branch.

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Q:If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is here to hear it, will it make a noise A:That Philosopher probably had a lot of herbal tea in the morning

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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What's the difference between unicorns and black people? Years of slavery.

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What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

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Abortion

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So a Mexican a Jew and a Philippino walk across the street What Happened? the border patrol shot them

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Why did the girl fall from the tree? Gravity.

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25.

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Q. Why was the black man sad? A. He had a book nailed into is leg.

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What do you get when you cross two things that are seemingly unrelated? A play on words.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Even though I can't tell Because I am color blind

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? No. Oh don't worry then.

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

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The Piglodocus has been featured in films such as "Jurassic Pork" and "Land before Swine".

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One time there was a man walking down the street. Wrong, it is physically impossible to walk down a street, you can only walk along it.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Jim Jim who? Oops, wrong house.

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Why did the clown have a heart attack? He had long term heart problems.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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