Why did the princess kiss the frog? She really wanted a wart.

What did the boy say after he got hit by a bus? Nothing. He's dead.

"Hey ask me if i'm fat" "Are you fat" "Leave me alone"

If 3 days ago was yesterday and today is Friday, how many legs does 7 dogs, 3 ducks, and 2 chickens have if the answer was red? Okay, not to sound rude but I'm gonna take a wild guess and say.....yo mama is so fat when she read this joke she ate the whole bucket of popcorn and didn't even share.

What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

What did the fat man do? He fell over...

vatalk you are retarded!!!!!

Knock knock! Who's there? A doorbell-salesman

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

Q: Where do zombies shop? A: Zombercrombie.

Friends are like lettuce; If you eat their head, they die

How many immature teenagers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Your Mum.

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? eating the worm causing it to breed inside of your body later causing them to eat you internally

What happened to the boy with cancer? He died

Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

What did one duck say to the other duck? Quack.

Roses are red Violets are blue I like pussy Because it feels really good when I stick my penis inside her vaginal opening

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A co-pilot

ha ha, I can talk and you can't.

whate white and cant climb trees? powdered sugar

osama bin ladin is dead. let's get a beer.

What did the man say when he saw his t.v. floating in the middle of the night? I must be seeing things. By logic, televisions don't float. My weary eyes must be playing tricks on me and I should probably go back to sleep.

Why didn't the condemned man seek a reprieve of his execution? He forgot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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