A german walks into a London Pub. He turns to the man on his left and says, " Hallo Kolleginnen und dort bar Mäzen. Ich bin gespannt zu sehen, ob wir eine Beziehung herzustellen, wie ich gesucht Gespräch, als ich in der wunderbaren Kultur, die London zu bieten hat. Ist das in Ordnung mit dir? Heil Hitler"

If Chuck Norris and Bruce Lee got in a fight, who would win? Chuck Norris, since Bruce Lee is dead.

Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: Well, he was in the first tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over warn everybody in the second tower. While he was in the second tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL! Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on a park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich with extra mayonnaise)

Jimmy clenches his fist, a crack his heard. Jimmy begins to cry knowing his arthritis has gotten worse.

Q. Why was the black man sad? A. He had a book nailed into is leg.

why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was taped to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? it didn't

There once was a boy walking over a railroad track. He got hit by a train. He died.

Q:what do you call someone who spends 7 hours a day playing video games? A: Someone who takes pride and joy from gaming

Q-what did lady gaga say to the retard when he asked why he's so stupid? A- Cuz baby u were born this way

How many blondes does it take to finish a math test? 1 if she isn't copying.

How many apples do you end up with if your dog is a golden retriever who got raped by a giant scorpion? A jail

What did the black man say to the Jewish man Nothing, because they were walking on the street and did not know each other

What happened when the car hit the man? He died.

What sits in the corner of a room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler.

what do you call a man that is hurt? A: you call him an ambulanse

A black man goes to his dentist appointment and the doctor asks, have you brushed your teeth today laderius? the black man replies: Yes, but my name is not laderius

why did rhys jones get shot. because he was there

My friend thinks he's smart, He said that onions are the only food that make you cry. So I threw a coconut at his face.

Why do things made by Glen taste so good? Because he has mastered the cream

Her Majesty's Government of the United Kingdom of Great Britain

What's blue and smells? A dead girl guide.

How do u kill a black man You don't or else u will get intouble for murder but u can if u want there r many ways

Have you ever had Ethiopian food?? Neither have they...

i had a dream last night;) it was sad because you lived but then i dreamed up a bus and made it hit you. i had a dream last night;) you died

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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