How do you make someone to shut up You tell them to SHUT UP!

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because black people are usually stronger than chicken. If they weren't, chickens would probably eat fried black people.

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Why did the crossing guard drop his whistle? Because a kid got hit by a passing elephant.

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why wasnt the baby cute? -because it was dead

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Women deserve equal rights.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A very unfortunate blind fish.

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What do you call a black man repairing a car? A mechanic who has worked very hard to gain his qualifiaction.

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How many baby's does it to paint a wall red? It depends how many you throw.

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A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

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What do you call a sober man driving a car? a designated driver

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How do you stop a plane? Land it.

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hmm, thinking, thinking, SNAPPLE!

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A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

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Patrick, I just thought of something funnier than 24. Lemme hear it. 25.

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alert("Hello");

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You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

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why do police kill so many young black men in America? it's a difficult question that deserves a thoughtful response. many complex issues are at play, but we also feel a sense that something must be done. we cannot ignore some of the forces at work here, yet we cannot all personally take responsibility, either. or maybe he wanted to steal his girl. that shit really happens. THAT SHIT LEGIT HAPAPNES.

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A duck flies into a bar. The bartender allows it to stay because it turns into a beautiful swan. The goose then lays a golden egg and the bartender stares in awe as a giant bean stalk grows out of the egg. He's ecstatic and really glad he let the flamingo stay with all the wonderful colors and magic going on.

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Yo mama so short she often has to ask you to retrieve items from the top shelf of her cabinet.

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What's a foot long and slippery, a slipper

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Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

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What would make African women very happy? food and healthcare for their kids, and a proper education.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops