38 studio's new game... Finance City

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What is Mary short for? She has no legs.

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I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

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Why did john have to have back surgery He needed his back "screwed" up

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Skeletons neither have muscles nor brains to control any muscles and therefor cannot transport themselves across a road or any stretch of land for that matter.

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willam dafoe

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Random link time! http://www.booksie.com/thrillers/novel/declan_mckimm/pure-evil

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your ball sack ripped off with a grapple hook

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Nothing is as strong as love, Except a nuclear warhead that can destroy entire cities! :P thoko like :D ~~k0mradey``

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

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I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

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How many people like gang rape? 9 out of 10

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Anything you like, he's blind.

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Why did the Asian man have to sit down to pee? Because he had no legs.

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-I have an idea! Let's play twenty questions! -Alright! But i have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

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Thumbs up if u dont have aids:)

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rocky is here again.......................

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Why did the fat guy smell bad? He just farted diarrhea.

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Why did the boy fall of his bike? He's learning to ride and understandably lost his balance.

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What is wet, white and sticky? Glue, of course.

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How does a Welshman take a shit? Like anyone other human being does.

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What's the safest way to tell a racist joke? Ask everybody who might hear the joke if they would be offended by a racist joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops