What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Mine.

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What would George Washington do if he was able to talk to all of America? Ask them to dig him up.

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Chicken

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Whats worse than not having fun at a party? Getting so drunk at a party that you shat in your pants Whats worse than shatting in your pants at a party drunk? Shatting in you pants twice because you were so drunk again.

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One sux, the other is decent. But supporting the sucky one shows u are dedicated.

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69

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Whats more fun than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork.

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Miley Cyrus Walked into a fence and fainted.

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What do an asian, a black man, and a Mexican all have in common? They all belong minorites that at one time have been outcast by society

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"Why did the chicken cross the road? ... To get to your house. Knock knock." "Who's there?" "The chicken"

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So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

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Women's rights.

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Why did the room go dark? Somebody turned the lights off

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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud, and cross back again? Because he was a dirty double crosser

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A penis walks into a bar..

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The funniest thing happened in my dream last night, i dreamed that banks would stop ripping people off and start treating people like humans. How wierd is that :D

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Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

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How do you drown a blond? You hold her underwater.

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Q:How do you kill an Elephant? A:With an Elephant gun Q:How do you kill a blue Elephant? A:With a blue Elephant gun. Q:How do you kill a purple Elephant? A:With a purple Elephant gun. Q:How do you kill a red Elephant? A:There is no such thing.

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Why are there so many little girls falling off swing jokes? Because you tuch youself at night.

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what would you get if you combined a sixth grader with a machine gun? A homophobe

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Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a d!ck you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now

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why couldn't the little boy sleep? he was being tortured.

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whats brown and stickey? a brown stick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops