Roses are red, Violets are blue, my dick is hard, and it's cumming for you.

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Why shouldn't I go out today? Well I haven't done any work today. Actually no. It's not that. I'd have to ask my guardian Sally to bring out the wheelchair, and well, I'm afraid of her. She beats me. My hobbies are playing football, watching Loose Women and looking at pictures of Gary Barlow on Google Images.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas A bike.

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Why did the blonde stay in the five-star hotel? She had enough money.

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Life is like a bridge. You get walked on all your life until you fall apart.

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wsde

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An orphan falls off a cliff.

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Why couldn't the boy hide his penis? Circumcision.

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff.

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Evan Ramsey hahaha go CAD

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Billy wanted a toy for Christmas. Sadly, Billy died before Christmas.

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Q: How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? A: Ele PHa n T

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How do you make time fly? You can't, time is the duration of events and therefore cannot "fly".

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An alien just ate your family and all of the things you love

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What's purple, smells like an eggplant, and looks like an eggplant? An eggplant.

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What do you call a million pigs jumping out of an aircraft? Bacon.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his kids.

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Three blind mice. See how they run. Into things.

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A Women is holding a piece of paper with her rights what is she holding a grocery list

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Have a nice day! Dont tell me what to do.

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Doesn't matter, had sex. Except for the STD's I possibly contracted.

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How do you get a black kid to sleep? A cup of warm milk and maybe a lulluby should do it.

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A woman walks into the kitchen to see her husband cooking dinner because gender stereotypes have been dead for years.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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