what is black and white and red all over? a group of people of mixed races playing paintball.

joe: guess what. Bob: what. Joe: nothing I just wanted to talk

what did Tim get for Valentimes day? nothing, no such day exists. spell check

How do you kill an elephant? -With a gun? No, an elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? -With an elephant gun? No, with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a blue elephant? -WIth a blue elephant gun? No, you choke it until it turns blue and kill it with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a purple elephant? Theres no such thing as a purple elephant, thus contradicting the reality of performing a major act of animal abuse on it.

I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I was raped by a giant scorpion...

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one turns to the second, and says nothing, because muffins can't talk. They then both die because the temperature in the oven was 370 degrees.

Why did the blonde girl lie? Because she's a liar.

So a woman goes to the doctor for an ultra-sound. The doctor says I have good news. The woman inquisitively replies what is it doctor, the doctor replies ; Your baby is Dead.

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

How do you find a true idiot jump in the road when the light is green.

When will pigs fly? When they grow horns

why did the black man cross the road? to get away from the racists

What is hard, long, moist, and flesh colored? A hotdog you dirty, dirty bastard!

Q: Whats 5+5 A:10

my rhyme is sicker than the holocaust

What do you call a bear in the rain? A wet bear.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

When life throws you lemons, Throw grenades.

Q. Why did the television set turn on? A. Because someone pressed the power button.

So i can type anything in this box and it shows up on the website?

What do you get when you take a bag of chips and divide it by 5? a Nike store worker's meal

What do you call somebody with no arms or legs and they are stranded in the middle of the ocean? Answer: screwed

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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