How do you make seven an even number? You don't, it's impossible.

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What did Santa say when he fell down? Ouch

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Last night I had a lovely chicken burger I had no mayo left so had to make do with coleslaw but enjoyed it anyway.

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How long does it take to acheive a superbowl win? However long it takes you.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock? Who's There? Not Suzy. What did Suzy want for Christmas? Parents who loved her. What did Suzy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin get in the car.

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why did the other chicken cross the road peer pressure

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Roses are red Violets are blue. most poems rhyme but this one doesn't!

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What did the construction worker bring with him to work? - Tools

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what is black and looks like a rasberry a blackberry

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What is the hardest thing about eating a vegetable? the wheelchair

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Two peanuts walked into a bar... One was a salted.

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"Really, how is your wife?" "You know she's dead right?" "Cool mine too!" They high five in mid air and lived happily ever after

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A man walks into a bar, politely orders one drink, sips it while having social conversations with his peers, pays his tab, and goes to take the bus home. I can respect that.

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What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Two holocausts.

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So 185 cowboys walk into a bar and the bartender says "I can't serve 185 cowboys!" The cowboys ask why not and the bartender says "Because that would exceed the legal maximum occupancy of this building."

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Have you ever heard of a goose?

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Unfortunate

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What's worse than dying in a car wreck with your family? You being the only one that dies.

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If a quiz is quizzical, what's a testicle?

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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autsim

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whats polish and black a polish black person

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So a man walks into a bar... ouch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops