why wasnt johnny in math class?....he slipped and cracked his skull on his way there, he is now recovering at the hospital

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Jesus, Buddha and Mohamed walked into a bar and say: "There is as much validity in this fiction as in our collective works.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Max. Max who? Max who starts his greeting with,  "In accordance with Megan's law"  

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Why did the lamborghini drive off the cliff? Because the person driving was a fridge

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Knock knock? Who's there? John. John who? John who is hospitalized in critical condition because he was struck by a ladder.

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What do you get a kid with no arms for Christmas? Hungry, Hungry Hippos.

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Q: A man, already drunk, walked into a bar. What did he say? A: Ouch!

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What did one apple say to the other apple? -Nothing, apples can't talk

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? That depends on what his name is.

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roses are gray, violets are grayer, f*ck this poem and listen to the slayer.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

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If the covalent bonds of two Hydrogen atoms and one Oxygen atom creates water, which subs are currently on the 5-dollar-foot-long menu at Subway?

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What do you call a full refrigerator? A freezer

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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whos on the right track? lady gaga

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Two cows in a field. One said, "Moo!" the other said, "Shit! i was going to say that."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why don't you ask the chicken. I am sorry but I as a human being am totally incapable of understanding and communicating with chickens.

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What succeeds most of the time? The population of a field with grass.

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There was a two car pile up at wal-mart. 50 mexicans were killed.

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Why did the chair fall off the cliff? Well it is an inamitate object so it did not move itself, someone must have threw it

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs skiing? Skip.

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Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar? Actually it's my cookie jar, and my cookies. I stole nothing.

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Q: Whats the worst thing to drop in a prison shower? A: An exploding nail gun

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Why did sally fall off the swings? She didn't have any arms. Knock Knock, Who's there? Not Sally, she doesn't have any arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops