Q: what's worse than getting the flu? A: getting cancer

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what did one mute say to the other? Nothing.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting cow wh- SHUT UP!

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What did Larry do when little Billys baseball crashed through his window? He raped and murdered little Billy for Larry has raped and murdered many children.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his soon to be butchered family.

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a man walks into a bar... he was then shot to death because he was a slave in the early 1800s

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the little boy fall down the steps? Because he wasn't a very stable person.

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What did the asian boy's parents say when he came home with a report full of b-pluses? "You did well, but try harder next time."

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why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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hi penis ham telephone

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Q: what did the grandmother give to her grandson. A: a lightbulb

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Q. What does physiks sound to most of the people? A. There were two camels, one was green, how much does the sand weight when its dark?

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What's the difference between 10 dead baby's and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

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Studies show that 95% of house fires are caused by fire.

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What happened when the man got into the taxi? The driver shot him 17 times in the chest and ran away

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What's large, black and can be found in Australia? A large black Australian man.

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A fish swims up your penis...

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What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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Why was the chicken angry? Because he was tired of everyone questioning his motives.

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What do you call a fly with no wings? Disabled

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where did you get those clothes? at the toilet store.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Orange! -door opens- You fucking come over here selling oranges one more time Julio and I will have you deported.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops