Yo momma is so ugly, that your father can no longer stand her. They are getting divorced.

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Rose: Mummy, why did you name me Rose? Mother: Because a rose fell on your head when you were a baby Daisy: Mummy, why did you name me Daisy? Mother: Because a daisy fell on you when you were a baby Fridge: durr hurr Mother: Shut up, Fridge

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Friends are like trees, They fall down if you hit them several times with an axe.

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Why was the young Jewish boy afraid at camp? Because his scoutmaster is a pedophile.

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Guy at computer: My computer won't turn on. Help desk Guy: Did you try restarting. Guy at computer: No. The help desk guy hangs up and the guy at the computer proceeds to cry because he has failed.

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Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because it is the norm with that particular religious group to circumcise male infants shortly after birth.

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What did the dyslexic say to the nun? When I write, I typically misplace letters in words.

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What do you call a group that has a microphone, a bass, two guitars and a drum kit? A Band

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What did the lawyer say to a lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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A man walks into a bar. He gets wasted and forgets the punchline.

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yo mamma so fat that when she goes out in high heels she comes back in flip flops

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How many Jews can fit in a Volkswagen beetle? Four, although five is possible if you are not afraid of getting a ticket.

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What did the blind, deaf, retarded kid get for Christmas? Spoiled.

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Shaving your balls is just plain nuts!

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Exercise Ex - Er - Cise Ex - Ar - Size.. Eggs Are Sides For bacon.. BACON

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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Why did Jenny fail her driving test? She was hit by a train.

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Why did Little Suzie fall off her bike? I hit her with a shovel. Why did little Suzie die? I hit her with a shovel and she fell off her bike.

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Liar liar, your dead nans carcass is on fire.

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What did the strawberry say to the strawberry? Nothing because strawberries are fruit and can't talk

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Yo momma so fat she when god said let there be let he said get the fuck out the way!

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why did the kid fall off the swing? someone threw a fridge at him

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Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

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Nah really, I start giggling like a dork whenever weird porn or whatever shows up on my computer, its just too weird. Fine ill use my glasses then, thanks for the comment by the way, I was really regretful for sending you that pic, but then again I did not have contacts then, nor did I want to photoshop anything.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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