Why didn't the chicken cross the road? A teenage girl was texting and driving, didn't see it, and now it's roadkill.

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what do you call a Puerto Rican with no arms? Trust worthy

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Two girls are backpacking in the Sierra Nevada. They walk 8 km from their base camp at a bearing of 42 degrees. After lunch, they document the wildlife they have seen because they are tracking the populations of species native to the area. Then they continue on their hike, but this time at a bearing of 127 degrees. After 5 km, they reach their destination for the day and set up a temporary camp.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Some wild chickens have regular seasonal migration patterns that might require them to cross a road while traveling south. Wild chicken movements include those made in response to changes in food availability, habitat or weather.

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A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "Yes, with proper medical attention and rest, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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A russian, a mexican, and an american are all sitting in a tavern. The russian ordered vodka, the mexican orders tequila, and the american orders a beer. When the waiter arrives, the russian throws his vodka into the air, shoots it, and says "we got too many of those in our country". The mexican tosses up his tequila and says "we got too many of those in our country". The american throws up his beer, shoots the mexican, and says "we got too many of those in our country". And then drinks his beer.

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Are you trolling with me? I mean how can you know where I live if you have not even picked up the phone yet? Listen, if you wanted to make me upset, you did it okay? You won, I like you a lot and I would never do such a thing. I understand you being upset Nero, I am so sorry, I never meant nor wanted for this to happen, I hope you can forgive me someday.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 raped six's mother

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What's worse than being annal raped by a black man? Well lots of things are but being raped by a guy who has around a 7 inch penis may be hurtful I'm sure being cut open and eaten alive may be worse;)

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If you give a mouse a cookie, he will probably eat it then have a heart attack due to the high level of sugar in the cookie

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Yo momma is so stupid, she has no job, five kids, and six weeks to live, due to the fact she spent all her money on cigarettes and now has lung cancer.

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Knock knock Who's there Knock knock Who's there Knock knock Who's there Never mind

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Why did the batmobile lose a wheel? Because the Joker was raping Robin too hard!

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your mother is a well respected woman in society and makes delicious cookies.

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Well, first of all, what I have overcome both mentally (trauma) and physically (lots of shit) is in the past, lets leave it there. Second yeah, I can basically shift my sense of left and right at will, meaning I can choose which arm to write with, and write things mirrored without even thinking about it, I can fool my senses basically, one second I struggle playing the piano because I have just trained with one, then I make my brain believe I have been practicing with both, its simple, but complicated to explain, while my ears are perfectly normal, I got two sets of balance nerves, it just gets more complicated from there.

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A black man goes down to Alabama in the 1960s; He gets lynched.

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What's Black,White and red all over? A black person with a skin disease on her period.

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What's better than sex? I have never had sex and, therefor, do not have adequate knowledge of the experience enough to make a comparison to other experiences. You should ask someone who has had sex.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple this joke.

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A christian and an atheist are in a bar. The christian says "if you don't accept Jesus Christ as your lord and savior you will go to hell." The atheist replies "No I won't."

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A- 2 jews walk in a bar..what happed? B- they died 35 years later from skin cancer

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a white van was driving really slow and he stopped in front 3 children. "do you want some candy" the old man said. the kids took the candy and the old man drove away happily, knowing he made someones day.

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Steve buys 60 watermelons.. What does he have? A lot of watermelons.

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A chicken rode into town on a horse named Friday. He was later shot by a dyslexic Russian dinosaur.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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