Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

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So a horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "why the long face?" It proceeds to then crap on the floor and walk out,because its a horse.

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Man#1: Who's John? Man#2: John is John. Who else do you want him to be? Why do you ask stupid questions? Are you naturally this dumb? Do you like the questions I ask? Man#1: (Turns away as he is deeply offended by the man who rudely answered his question.)

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Your mom is so fat that she turns "One Size Fits All" to "One Size Fits Most"

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Sara

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What do a Nazi and a Democrat have in common? They are both members of a highly supported political faction.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a room? This is impossible as dead babies are incapable of achieving such a feat.

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Once opon a time there was a black America He name was Bob

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Q. Why didn't the Atheist enter the church? A. Because Atheists do not go to church so he had no reason to enter.

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What do you call two black people in the same sleeping bag? A newly married couple on their camping adventure honeymoon.

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masturbating on a tarc bus

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A white man walked into a bar, and an indian walked into a totem pole...

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why did the duck swim upside-down -he was on quack

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What do you call a alcaholic walking down the street..... Roadkill

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KONY 2012! *world rises up cheering in spontaneous patriotism for Africa* Leader of KONY 2012 arrested for public masturbation

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why didnt the old man go to his sons birthday he died.........nah i lied he went went

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What did the suspicious Hunchback say? I've got a hunch.

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What's funnier than Tom Cruise laughing like a badass? Chuck Norris

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Heeeheeeerrrrrrrrrrr

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Sometimes i like to paint myself red and then curl up into a ball and pretend i'm a tomato.

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what do u call a man being beaten in the street the cops

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Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman

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A white man, a black man, a Mexican man and a Chinese man were on the same bus. The didn't socialize cuz that would count as racism

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops