why was the little girl crying? Because her family was dead

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Why couldn't the pirate enter into the movie? Because he's dead.

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Friends are a lot like trees. If you hit them multiple times with an axe, they will fall down.

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What did the doctor say to the pregnant mother? Your babies dead

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Ill admit it Nero, although you act like a savage you make a fine statement there, maybe we will ask her to join one time huh?

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knock knock whos there your mother open the door

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what looks like a sock and goes on peoples feet? A sock

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Get it? More.

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How many alzheimers patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side

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Why was the drunk person arrested? He said to a police officer "I'm gay, so shut up you b****."

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What do you get when Johnson cooks toast? Shit toast.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sunflowers are yellow, Daises are white.

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Why did peter shake the baby? To kill it and rape its dead corpse

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I'm on a see food diet- it consists of fish and molluscs. sea*

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What did the guy say to the girl when he was holding a tool? You're a tool????

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Why did piglet look down the toilet for pooh? He had a horrible mental illness

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A priest and a rabbi walks into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says "is this some kind of joke?".

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Japanese study of the stereotypical Italian under scientifical environment: Japanese: Test one: Hello! Italian: AHAHA HOHOO! WHOPPIE! ME IS MARIO MARIO I AM MAGIC MUSHROOM EATING PLUMBER! I AMMA GONNA JUMP ON YOU (AND gRAPE YOU!) Japanese: ACTIVATE FLAMETHROWERS GET! Italian: AHAHAHAHAHOOOOOOOOOOO! Japanese: OMG ITALIAN IS STRONG! ACTIVATE TRAP DOOR! ITALIAN: *falls down door* MAMA MIA! OH NOH! Japanese: Puh! BEWARE OF ITALIAN STEREOTYPE! Experiment two:Japanese experiment with in actual Italia: Japanese: Hello Mr Itali... Italian: Are you looking at me? Japanese: Uh well I... Italian: ARE YOU LOOKING AT MEEE? WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS TO LOOK ME IN THE EYES EH? Japanese: Balls? Uh my mother when she gave birth to... Italian: I SAID WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS TO TALK TO ME! ITALIANS ARE DANGEROUS!

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What has seven legs and cant walk? A paraplegic, and I lied about five of those legs.

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69 cents for a rainbow donut shaped as a 69....

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What did the rabbi say at the party? Mazel Tov.

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Once i tried to do math ! She wasn't getting wet so i stopped!

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what happens if you fart to hard? A.you shit yourself

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Why did the little girl run to her mother? Because she saw a police inspector, who had already tried to kill her several times that week, aiming a poison dart at her forehead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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