whats worse than falling off of your bike? thats as bad as it gets,try to think of something else

Why did the parents tell their adopted son to go to bed? He was awake long after he should've been, according to the rules in their household.

Whats The Meaning Of Life? 42. But everyone has their own perception so you have your own answer so why the heck did i write this joke. Oh wait Im writing still. The answer is 42.

Josh Brown loved coressing his mums doodle at night.

how do you hurt sombody? cut off their legs.

Why did the submarine crash? Someone opened the window

Why couldn't the emo kid finish reading his book? Because he was on the titanic when it sank.

Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Wanna have sex?

Jims family is having a picnic. Jim goes and gets his food. shortly after he drops his food. Jim is really sad and goes and gets more food. Jim is black

A construction worker walks into a bar. Lucky he was wearing his hard hat.

Why did the chcicken cross the road? To get to the other side nl

A duck walks into a bar Its theoretical comical universe implodes from the destructive weight of inevitable punchlines and everyone in the bar dies.

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

knock knock whos there haha this is a shit joke anyone that reads this is a jimmy saville follower and got fingered up the bum hole violently by him love you

what is funnier than one dead baby in a dumpster? There is nothing funny about the homicide of a minor, and the murder should be immediately investigated.

How do you make a suicide jumper not jump? Shoot him instead.

What comes after 69? mouthwash

Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

What do you call a moving tree? A hurricane killing thousands of people and 3 dogs.

Meh, I dont want it anymore! You take it!

when push comes to shove, shove repeatedly explains to push that she needs to stop stealing his money and find a new place to live. Push then leaves, allowing shove to return back to his sofa and finish watching the basketball game.

What happens when a leprechaun refuses to give you his pot of gold? He doesn't give you his gold.

Knock, knock ... ... ... Well I guess no one is home.

There once was an old man. He had worked hard his whole life to make sure his children got everything they needed, and that they were always happy. He had a beautiul life and a great big house with a marvelous view of the ocean. In time his kids moved away, and his wife died. The old man was left all by himself in the great big house, and sometimes the emptiness of the house reminded him of the emptiness of his own heart. He very seldom cried though, and kept all of his emotions inside. One day it all became to much for him and he took his own life in the silence of his great big empty house. I was that ocean.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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