Q: What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: The pizza does not scream in the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

When A Shouty Man Goes Into His House. His Sister Nearly Kills Him So When A Shouty Man Goes Into A Library. The Books Try To Kill Him.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

I guys look at this new game I bought, what is it, it's called penis it's supposed to be toatally hard

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: Why didn't the dirty man jump into the shower? A: Because he spotted the potential danger to jump into a slippery shower and proceeded with caution.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A black man walks into a KFC, he then realizes that he is in the wrong store, and walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Did you hear about the guy in town living in a tyre, he got a puncture now hes living in a flat.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you've already told her twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

There were a dog and a cat in a family house. The dog turned to the cat and said .. nothing because a dog can not speech the human language.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was Timmy late for class? He got hit by a bus. Why was Jimmy late for class? He saw Timmy lying in the middle of the street, went out to help and got hit by another bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Isn't everyday "black tie optional"?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why couldnt the girl braid her hair? She had cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the guy say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? 1

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why couldn't anybody at school taste lunch? Nobody made lunch.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

My mind is like full of holes so I cannot remember where I am anymore, and I am tired in addition, but say, what the hell is a tussle? Sounds cute, but what is that?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a Muslim on the moon? An astronaut

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did the zombie eat bob because bob was delicious

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Is your daddy a thief? Because he stole my wallet.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

a boy scout wipes his butt with a dollar cause he had no toilet paper then the other boy scout hears him screaming they meet up later and the other boy scout askes why he was scream and the first boy scout says that is hard to wip your butt with 4 quarters.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

how do you get a blonde to stop following you? file a restraining order.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What is worse than being lost in the supermarket? Being lost in space.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops