What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' The horse says 'My alcoholism is destroying my family.'

Why wasn't Steve paying attention in class? Because he was dead.

time to spruce up!

why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

I wanted to burn alot of calories so i found a fat kid and set him on fire. :3

Roses are red. Violets are blue. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT IS.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding poo in your shoe.

Anne Widdecombe becomes attractive.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What's similar about a fish and an eagle? They can both fly, except for the fish.

what do you call something that dosint exist? nothing.

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

Why did the man throw his son out the window? His house was on fire

Q :Why did the girl fall off the swing? A: She had no arms.

A man named Hank, from Idaho takes a trip to Michigan. When he arrives, he rents a house and starts a meth lab. Hank is spending 7 years in jail. Hank was charged with stealing.

What do you say to a jew with blood on his leg? Are you okay?

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer

There are two fish in a tank and one says to the other, "how do we drive this thing?"

A bear walks in a restaurant and asks for a table for one. Meanwhile, everyone else in the restaurant is freaking out because there is a bear in there

Q: How do you kill a goblin if the fries are next to the sushi? A: Yes. Walruses have nostrils and rubber chickens don't like microwaves!

What happens when your first name is Newton? You get nicknamed NEWT

A mute man writes a joke that would only be funny to blind people.

What do elephants and grapes have in common? They are both purple arpart from the elephant, which is grey. I lied about it being purple

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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