A French man, Irish man and Japanese man walk into a bar, seeing as the men speak different languages no conversation begins.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why couldn't little Suzie snap her fingers? Her stepfather cut off her fingers after becoming a drunk and leaving her family.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How did the farmer stop the chicken from swearing? Cutting it's head off, skinning it, plucking it's feathers and cooking it on a medium heat for about an hour. He then served it up to his family with green beans, mash and parsnips.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A child walked into the bar. He was promptly asked to leave because he was too young.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the jewish plumber commit suicide? After years abuse from his alcoholic father and rich sibling, he finally snapped and killed himself on his birthday after nobody told him happy birthday.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats the hardest thing to have sex with? a goldfish.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What does the hulk do when he's angry? Compulsively masturbate.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is the difference between a tree and a person? Trees don't scream when hit with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do you make a little boy cry? Slap the cookie out of his hand.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

meh

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Your momma's so dumb she graduated high school with a C average.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the nun cry? 12 babies were killed under her care.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

"knock knock" "who's there" "I dont know, check the door"

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A Matthew walks into a room. Everyone left. This is not a joke

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I like doodle. XoXo Jamie

thumb_up thumb_down -3

"Doctor, doctor, I am having a hard time controlling my muscles!" "It's Lesche-Nyhan Syndrome, this is a genetic terminal illness...i'm sorry."

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A horse walks into a bar, it broke both its legs and was then put down.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

violets are green roses are purple this makes total sense, cheeseburger

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's sadder then a dead puppy? 2 dead puppies.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What is worse then dying of testicular cancer? Living of testicular cancer and having one amputated?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Your mom is so poor that her boobs are real.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Amanda Knox walks home free.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops