How do you kill a Jewish person? You shoot him multiple times in the face

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Q: How do you measure a ruler A: You don't.

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Oh NOES! She does worry about me! YOU MUST APOLOGIZE! Relax, the body has two sources of happy drugs, one is the sweet calm stuff I am really bad at, and the other comes with adrenaline and stuff, the name of which I do not remember, both are important, but yeah, I am a thrill seeker, and when I do not find them, I make a thrill out of whatever I got, whatever that means.

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Why cant a black person read? Because there is nothing to read...

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how do you kill a blond? give her a gun and tell her it a blow dryer

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What happens when a fat guy falls ? Ohio has another earthquake.

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drew edminstin is a rat

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I couldn't afford haircuts so I purposely contracted cancer

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What's worse than the holocaust? Jewish people!

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Kevin and Ramin

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Why did the dog have no legs? Because its previous owner had cut them off.

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Why did Jenny fail her photography class? Because Jenny has epilepsy and she had a coma while taking the final exam. To this day Jenny is drain dead in the hospital.

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Q. What do you call an average middle-aged white man who walks into a bar and asks for a drink? A. Not a very funny joke

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Sex! Sex Who? Sex with me. BOOM!

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Knock Knock Whos there? Rivkee Rivkee who? RIVKEEEEE FIRETRUCK!

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look im not better than you, your a ten im a two your a queen im a fool you got looks i got scares u got talent i got beuty to its a win win

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What do you call a fat man who can turn slim? I don't know

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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why are anti-jokes so funny? they aren't. they're stupid.

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roses are gray, violets are grayer, f*ck this poem and listen to the slayer.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Why was Timmy crying when he got home? His family was dead in a pile with a pitchfork going through each of their bodies

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A car walks into a bar.

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Women's rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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