Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Marilyn Manson was walking to church.

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Why didn't the ice cream cross the road? ??(?/?) ?. (KOREAN)

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Knock knock who's thare Your mom She's dead you bitch

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Why did the fox cross the road? To chew on the chicken carcass.

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What do you call a black prostetut with braces. A black and decker pecker wrecker

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Why was the little boy speechless? His best friend was just run over by a plow truck.

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What's the difference between a gay person and a Nazi? No gay person systematically murdered 6 million people.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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A. Do you know the best part about Anti Jokes? B. No

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I've got a shotgun, Give me the money.

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cop arrests a jew and interrogates him Jew. i aint telling you nothing cop: really cop pours a bag of coins on the table jew: thats about $7.80 cop: you can have it if you tell us what we want to know jew: ok jew: i stole the money 123

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? -absolut vodka Well, you have a sirious drinking problem...

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Dear Rubix Cube, DONE!! Sincerely, Colorblind

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Q. What did Michael Jackson say to the banana? A. Nothing, he's dead.

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What song does the lady camel sing to seduce male camels - my humps my humps my humps my humps How did sergay the camel respond? -we dont know. He died a fatal death involving hippos in hula skirts, and flying guavas

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q: what do you call a hooker you pay in spaghetti? A: a pasta-tute.

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What is the difference between a baby and a log? I don't have a log in my fireplace

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why was six afraid of seven It wasnt. numbers are not sentient or tangible and thus are incapable of feeling fear

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What is Wonder Woman's drug of choice? Heroine.

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Your mother is so classy, when I asked her to order at a fast food drive through she decided to park the car a eat inside.

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whats yellow and cant swim? A bulldozer

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there once was a man from Nantucket. I want to ride in a helicopter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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