Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

A man walks into a dairy. Most people will not get this as it is cultural slang and they will think it is referring to dairy products.Oh well. This was going to be a good joke.

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he's human.

How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

if you are reading this your wasting your time

What did the sign say? It said slow down

how can u tell if you have cancer if the doctor says so

Why couldn't the Asian man drive very well? He was blind from birth.

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Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

Why did the black man scream in church? He felt like it.

How did the chicken cross the road? Assuming the vehicles yielded to the chicken, it looked both directions before crossing then proceded across the street while staying between the crosswalk lines until it had reached the other side of the road.

A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

Dani Barton is not that! She is a great girl with a strong heart and feelings. The statement below is a joke, hence why it was published on AntiJokes. This is NOT a joke however.

Q: What did the tree say as he fell? A: Studies have shown plants in general do not have a voice box, thus making plants incapable of speaking.

Roses are red Violets are blue You just lost the game UMAD Bro?

What's worse than the Holocaust? 2 Holocausts

You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

What's the best way to win a race? Run faster than all other participants.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

Why did the McCann's parent's leave the window's and doors open? Because Portugal is a very hot climate, And they expected the place they were staying to be safe as lot's of tourist's stay there throughout the year.

The awkard moment when you realize you either have cancer, are pregnant, or a combination of the two.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

What's the difference between a smart blonde and bigfoot? There's been sittings of bigfoot

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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