What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pig, because even if a pig could learn karate its still a pig.

Yo mamas so fat, when she jumps in a pool she displaces a disproportionate volume of water.

Your mom

A Fat person walks out of mcDonalds

Why do you put babies in the blender feet first? To hear them scream.

Q: What's worst than the Holocaust? A: 6 million Jews

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was late for its laser bypass surgery.

Seven people walk into the same bar, like a solid pole. Ouch!

I used to be an adventurer like you, until old age slowly took away my ability to move and go adventuring

There was a irishmen in his house. He was thirsty. so he drank some water

Why did the chicken cross the road? it doesn't matter, it got turned into KFC before it crossed.

What happens when you poke a ghost that is on the edge of a building?? Ghost aren't real, so therefor you will fall of the building and die????

Why was the old man lying on the floor? He had a heart attack and died

What happens when you yank on someones nuts? They cry

Did you hear about the Pole who studied for 5 days?

What did the tractor say when he lost his farmer? Where's my farmer??????

How do you catch a Jew? Just give him a little shower ;)

what do you call a guy with no arm and legs laying by the door? Matt! what do you call a guy with no arms and legs floating on water Bob!

Wanna hear a joke? WNBA

A man died and went to heaven. Luckily, he was resuscitated by a trained medical professional, and after a stern warning from his doctor, he lost weight, limited the cholesterol in his diet, and went on to live a very happy and healthy life.

Where does Mario go after you finish the game? Drug rehab.

Q: What did the architect say after he tripped? A: My mother died of cancer when I was 6.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have cancer Nutella on muffin

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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