(kid is eating a round fruit) friend: Get me an apple too. Kid: I wish I could The kids friend later realizes that his friend was actually eating a peach.

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My son lost his first tooth today...so proud. Took my punch like a champ

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A Muslim walks into a bar No-one survives the blast

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You spent your time reading this and realized there was no joke.

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A man is hungry so he gets on his coat and shouts : "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!". His wife says not to because the police say the rapist 'Eggman' is out again. He says he will be very careful. On his way he hears 'They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggmen-" and the man shouts: "AND I AM THE WAlRUS, SO GET THE HECK OUTTA MY FACE OR I WILL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" The Eggman and the man found two more people from Liverpool and formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band broke up.

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Why did the little boy rush downstairs to the living room on Christmas morning? because he heard his mother screaming rape.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names.

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Why did the car get sucked up by the tornado? Because it was in Pilger, Nebraska.

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whats sad about 3 black people driving a Cadillac over a cliff? that was my Cadillac

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I left my car keys inside.

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How much wood would a wood-chuck chuck, If a wood chuck could chuck wood? A full study has never been commissioned into the amount of wood chucked by a groundhog and thus far remains an unknown quantity. ls

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A black man shoots someone. He was a cop and he killed a dangerous man who attacked him.

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how many cookies did the fat kid eat? a perfectly reasonable amount of cookies.

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chuck norris was bit by a snake, a few hours later he died

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Why didnt timmy go to the party Mom said no

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How do you make a person laugh? Tell a good joke How do you make them cry? Tell a sad story How do you make them cry and laugh at the same time? Tell a bad joke

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A horse walks in to a bar. The bartender asks: "why the long face?" The horse didn't respond, because it's a horse.

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What happened when the wife refused to make her husband a sandwich? Since he was paralyzed from the neck down, he starved to death.

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so an apple walks into a bar... I'm terrible at making jokes...

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Roses are red Violets are violet Jesus Christ how dumb can you get.

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This is sparta No this is patrick

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

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the midget went to the midget store

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2 corpses are sitting on a bridge one fell down both are dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops