Mary had a little lamb, its heart was black as coal, it crept into her room one night and ate her f***ing soul

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Q: knok knok A: Im home

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What did the biological child say to his adopted sister? We are both loved equally by our parents.

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Dude, that's not banana ice cream...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was attached to a bomb filled with spoons

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What's wrong with a muslim flying a plane? Nothing you racist

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What do you call a muslim flying a plane> .....a pilot

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Why does Eli Manning play for the Giants? Because he is huge.

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How do you eat a sandwich With yo mouth bi tch

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-What's funnier than a dog with no legs? -The movie Dumb and Dumber, in my opinion.

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What do you call a man who tripped on a rock? A man who tripped on a rock.

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How did the three girls get free drinks? Two of them were attractive and out of obligation to "the game" the third girl was also purchased a beverage.

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A white, black, and Hispanic man walk into a bar at 2:00 in the morning. Unfortunately the bar closed at midnight, so they were charged with breaking and entering, and were sentenced to 2 years in prison.

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Why was Susie crying? There was a frog stapled to her face.

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you gay?

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Why did the chicken cross the road Because early that morning she had found out that her husband had left her for another chicken. She became depressed and soon was suicidal so she started looking for an option out of her pain. So she tried to cross the road... She never made it.

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Q: how do you drown a blond A: put a mirror at the bottom of a pool

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What's worse than the holocaust? An open-minded black man.

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Girlfriend has 10 letters, but then again, so does freeeeedom

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How do you make a tissue dance? Tissues are inanimate objects, they cannot dance and thinking otherwise is foolish.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his farmer was abusive.

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Tina: Mom, would you love me if I was straight Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was gay Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was Bi Mom: No Tina: Why not Mom: Because that's selfish!

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Woof.

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Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops