Why did the guy in the ferrari stop? -He hit the median at 100mph.

knock knock who's there? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!

How do you minimize the likelihood of theft? Take the derivative.

Why did Susy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? NOT SUSY!

Dakota Fanning

what's worse than the holocaust? black people whats worse than black people? mexicans Whats worse than mexicans? 2 mexicans Whats worse than 2 mexicans? Africa

Why did the chicken cross the road? I wouldn't consider Mark a chicken. In fact, given the high speed and volume of cars traversing that particular road in both directions, I'd say it was a ballsy move. In hindsight, though, he probably should have waited for the "walk" symbol to appear for pedestrians, in order to avoid being run over by a bus. Anyway, if Pastor John would like to say a few words before we finally put Mark's body to rest...

What's worse than falling off a horse? Falling off a cliff.

There was once a man named Larry. Larry was an office worker for a paper company. One day when Larry was counting papers he got a papercut on his left hand. Therefore his finger began to bleed as he sat in agony. What did Larry do next? He got up and got a band-aid. Larry continued his paper work at his desk.

Why was the boy sad? Because his family was raped and stripped of their possessions

Men

What did the fat kid get for Christmas? Diabetes.

How do you keep your dog from running away? Put it on a leash.

Knock Knock The doors already open

Q: What do a dollar bill and a kite have in common A: I dont know

Q. what is the most amazing animal in the world? A. MULLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

What hurts more than a bee sting? Child birth.

Why is the melon having a wedding? Because it cantaloupe.

A white guy, a black guy, and an asian guy are all sitting on a park bench. They share several minutes of uncomfortable silence due to cultural differences.

knock knock ? Who's there ? idunnop idunnop who ? Eww you've done a what?!

Whats worse than spilling ketchup on your shirt? Getting hit by a bus

Hickory Dickory Dock. 2 mice ran up the clock. The clock struck one.. and the second one got away with major injuries, dying in a hospital three days later. The clock is now serving its 8th year in jail out of 25 years, and does not regret anything.

Q: Why do Indians smell? A: Cause they have noses? Racist.

Do you know what my Granddad said to me before he kicked the bucket? He said; how far do you think I could kick this bucket? Then he died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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