What would you do for a Klondike bar? Nothing they are disgusting and pollute your body with fats that are not necessary for you to live. -CNN.com 11.78534629/10 scientists agree with this fact.

Me: Ask me if i'm a truck. You: Are you a truck? Me: No.

Why did the black girls wear fancy clothes to the mall? Public nudity is considered a crime in many parts of the world. It would be advisable to wear clothes in public areas, so as to avoid being arrested.

Where's the best place to buy moon bars? Michael Toal

Wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is the girl next door.

whats long ,hard and full of sea men ? a sumureen

what do you get if you put a baby in a microwave? an erection

Why did i get some thing to eat? Because i was hungry.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was standing next to you.

A duck walks into a bar *************************** Later that day the homeless man had duck for dinner.

I hated hipsters before hating hipsters was mainstream. Does that make it sound like I have a fixed gear bicycle? Because I don't... I promise... What's a fixed gear bicycle, you ask? You mean you don't know???

Killing your friend as a joke.

A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

In Soviet Russia my freedoms are severally restricted by communism.

Why did the black man cross the road? He was going to meet up with his friend who happened to be Irish.

What's the difference between a zit and a priest? These two things are so different that I couldn't list all of the differences in this text box.

Why didn't the giraffe go to the zoo party? He didn't receive an invitation.

what do you call a bird that is gay bird a gaybird

Haikus usually make sense, but sometimes they don't refrigerator.

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?  The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that :  L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

justin bieber: ask me if im a boy are you a boy? no.

What is in the center of our galaxy? Some stars, space, and nebula.

A little boy was taken away in a black van with the promises of candy and a puppy of his very own. What he received? That fore mentioned, and more. The more? Ass rape

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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