What do you call it when you take cheese that isn't yours? Stolen bitch, your under-arrest!

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Why did the man buy fruits at the store? Because they were available, on sale, and the man was hungry, so he wanted to eat fruit at that time, he then got into his car, but thought to himself first, "I should unlock my car so I can open the door," so he does so, and sits in the drivers seat eating his fruit, he drives off to his home, arrives safely, and greets his family as he enters the house, then they sit down, eat dinner, and go to sleep, the next day, the man goes to the store, and buys vegetables

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A black man, hispanic man, and white man walk in to a bar. They are all friends. They enjoy a few beers together then call a taxi to take them home because it is irresponsible to operate a motor vehicle while under the influence of alcohol or other drugs.

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Chuck norris

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Why do jews have big noses? Because the air is free!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. What's worse than that? Hearing that joke a million times on this site.

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Poop

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whats the hardest answer ever? The one without a question.

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If a Cheetah and Usain bolt raced in the Olympics who would win? Obviously Usain hes black and cheetahs can't perform in the olympics

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Whats white and can kill you if it falls out of a tree? A refridgerator

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How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

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why did the chicken cross the road? there was chicken food on the other side

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Don't you hate it when you have 5 dead bodies, and you don't know which one to shoot your load on? -no

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I asked the librarian where to find a specific book. She told me where it was.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the marginal benefit of doing so exceeded the marginal cost.

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What's black and white and read all over? A lot of things.

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If life throws you melons, maybe you are hitting the melons.

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P1: why did the chicken cross the road? P2: to get to the other side. P1: Knock! Knock! P2: whos there? P1: THE CHICKEN!

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

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How do you distinguish between an unlabeled carton of milk and an unlabeled carton of cream without breaking the seals? You label them.

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What's bad about the the 3 black Jews that just died...... They were my friends

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What's big, green, has 4 legs, and if it falls out of a tree will kill you? A pool table

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Besides the kama-sutra, what is the most popular sex position in India? 68 and 88. Moral: Mutation people... mutation... use your imagination.., Still gotta feel a bit of envy/admiration, it is known as the happiest nation of the world, with a happiness rate with a constant well over 80 percent, and that is FAR over any other nation.

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When is a door not a door? When it has yet to be created from its base components.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops