Why did a chicken cross the road? To see The Doors.

A horse walks into a bar. Bartender: why the long face Horse: I'm dying of an incurable cancer...

whats black and yellow a chinese with a bruise

Why was David sad? Because he got his head stuck in a window.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer left the gait open.

Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he has has no arms.

Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

Is your refrigerator running. Yes. Good, then I don't need to call an electrician.

Knock knock "Who's there?" "Bark bark" "Bark Bark who?" "Bark bark bark bark bark bark."

What is the difference between a Nigga and a bucket of shit? ....The bucket.

What did the Hungarian say before he went to bed? "I'm going to bed," but he said it in Hungarian.

Q: How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? A: 2 in the front, 3 in the back and 95 in the ash tray.

Why Jimmy doesn't listen to his mother? Because he's deaf

Why do they bury lawyers 10 feet deep? Because deep down they are really good people.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Roses are red.

What's Green and has four wheels? A green car

Tyler is a downer and is always negative to everybody

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

I thought it was the WHITE house. C'mon Obama. C'mon

whats blue and fluffy? blue fluff.

what do you call a black clerk? one of the 2 billion people with a job, u bum!

A light bulb is very similar in shape to a pear. So, when you change a light bulb, don't replace it by a pear.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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