A black man walks into a bar. He is then beaten upon and hung, as this is the 50s.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck would chuck wood? I don't know. The woodchuck won't chuck wood.

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roses are red violets are blue i like elephants

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Racial Equality

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? That depends on a variety of factors.

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How many times have I said the word shingles? twelve.

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What's a cow's fovorite vacation spot? Farmyard animals do not receive vacations, they have long hours, no pay, and get eaten upon death.

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What's worse than a baby on a mattress? A baby under a mattress.

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Why did they bury the pope on the side of the hill? because he is dead -Eden Hogg

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patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

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Girl goes to see a sex therapist. Girl says, "Doc, though this has never been a problem, for the past 3 months I have been unable to reach climax. Can you help me?" Doc says, "Yes.". And after an intense 18 months of therapy the doctor helped the girl to discover that her inability to reach climax was related to issues of childhood sexual abuse. And after another 36 months of therapy the girl finally found the courage to confront and forgive her unrepentant abuser, as she realized that by not forgiving him, it was like drinking poison while hoping that he would die. And though the doctor did help her,as he had said, the girl never regained her ability to reach climax again.

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What did the black guy say to the drug dealer? "You should probably stop dealing drugs to people because it is illegal and you could be sent to prison for doing so."

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have stage IV Ovarian Cancer.

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That awkward moment when sentences don't end the way you octopus.

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How do you make an idiot in suspense?

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Knock Knock DAMMIT WOMAN MAKE ME A SAMMACH

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Why did hitler kill the Jews? Because he had sever mental illnesses and anyone who thinks the holocaust is funny deserves to die a slow death.

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If boobs are round. And so are balls. Then i just cant figure out why the sky is blue?

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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What do you call Bob if he gets a nose ring? Bob

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Christians pornstars.

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Q: Whats the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

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what did the tree say to the other tree? Don't leaf me!

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? You rub your bloody penis on her teddy bear.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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