"Knock Knock" "Who's there" "BOO" "BOO WHO" "No it's just BOO"

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the football coach say to fire up his team? Nothing. He was not legally allowed to say anything to his team as they were being locked out by the coach's boss, the owner of the team and anything that he said to them could lose him his job.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

My grandfather died in a Nazi Death Camp. He fell off a watch tower.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q.How many dinosaur species can jump as high as a house? A.All of them, houses can't jump

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why are the Jamaicans in the kitchen? because they are bad men

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Dakota Fanning

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did Batman's mother say when it was time for dinner? Nothing, Batman's parents are dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Knock Knock. Who's there? Frances. Frances who? Frances Payne.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q. What do you get when you cross a bird with a human? A. Arrested.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

When is a door not a door? When it's a pair of titties!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why couldn't Sammy ride a Bicycle? -Because Sammy is a Fish

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Two homeless men are baking in an oven. They scream loudly until they both die.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call a black Englishmen? Rodger

thumb_up thumb_down +23

You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Q:How do you kill a blonde? A:The same way you kill everyone else.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A man walked into a bar. That must have really hurt him.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

We got him in about five minutes, the kid will already be exhausted by the point we get to him, r rather, he gets to us. Pretty quick for a small geek I got to say, the photography we got of him is an obvious Photoshop, but he seems similar enough I guess. I would call, but it seems someone has been messing with all other "Erron`s" homes and phones if I had not dropped mine, I would not have noticed we have been bugged for a while, pretty professional gear too,

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the ant say when he walked in the club. . . Nothing he was immediately stepped on.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call a man with no arms or legs on the doorstep? The Diabetes man

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call a monkey holding a hand grenade? It depends on what its name is.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A man on an airplane is extremely frustrated by a small, screaming child. He puts on his headphones and listens to music.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Have you seen the Hobbit? Yes they're taking him to Isengard

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops