anal seepage

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what long green and bumpy? a pickle

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I walked up to the door and I asked the door how r u door, and he said, I'm a door!

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Me - Ask me if I am a Frog. You - Are you a Frog? Me - No.

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Knock knock Who's there? The events which followed are described by police as the August 4th massacre in which a family of five were brutally murdered by two prison escapees who broke into the house in search of a place to hideout.

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poop

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Women's rights.

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yo mumma is so smelly i can distictly smell her more than her perfume

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit him with an ax.

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Guess what sucks! A Vaccume. Guess what blows! A Sucky Vaccume.

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A apple is red a banana is to never mind that joke sucks

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24

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A black man checks his watch. He sees that its 3:50, and calmly carries on with his day.

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A bus crashes and everybody dies.

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Q:What's the difference ethernet a corvette and a pile of dead baby's? A:I don't have a corvette in my garage

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someone says they've been "dying laughing"... no they haven't; they're quite capable of still breathing and functioning in every day life.

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A dyslexic blind man

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It's Christmas in Iraq. Merry Christmas

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Who is big and stupid My brother

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Roses are red Zombies are hungry and blue My brain is half-eaten And what about you?

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" the Eggman and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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is this the krusty krab? no this is smooth lobster.

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What do you call a needy person? A person whos needs need needs.

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What has potential but is in fact disappointing? This joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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