POLITE NOTICE: Management Committee here. Please refrain from posting any anti-jokes which are not offensive to protected groups.

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A man walks into a bar, looks around, and reveals an AK-47 assault rifle he had been concealing beneath his trenchcoat. He then turns to his left and fires repeated shots around the bar, to the surprise and fear of many. Then he shoots himself. The death total is estimated at 9, including the shooter, while the total injured is around 22.

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why did the chicken cross the road? regardless of the fact his job at kfc was there, he felt that exercise was need to work off is thighs

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Why was the black guy charged for murder? He killed his wife.

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Knock Knock Who's there Me Me who ME LET ME IN

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whats worse than having no life? having no life and reading internet jokes all day!

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Friends are like potatoes, when you eat them, they die.

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Why did the white man cross the road? To pay his taxes.

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What do you call an asian with a small penis? Whatever his name happens to be.

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What's the difference between the son of a prostitute and Luke Skywalker? Luke knew who his father was.

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What do you call a hit and run victim with multiple injuries? An ambulance.

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Why the USA support the 'Kony 2012'? For Oil

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What's greasier than a baby? A burger

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How did the man get arested? For doing something leagle.

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What's funnier than slapping a girl? Calling the cops on the person who slapped her.

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A jewish man trips and breaks his nose

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What's worse than a gay joke? Their emotional repercussions, leading to a lack of self-esteem, which eventually drives the homosexual to commit suicide, leaving behind a now destroyed family.

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Evidently, in order to get any person of an object (most notably a swing) you must hit them with some form of large and/or sharp object.

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What do you call a Christmas tree with lights on it? A Christmas tree with lights on it.

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What do you do when you eat a loaf of bread? You throw it up because your brother made it

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If humans say YOLO what do cats say? meow.

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So a moose, a deer, and a horse walk into a bar. One of the people at the bar was a hunter who was carrying his gun. Several people got up and left after they realized the potential danger of the situation.

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What did hitler say to Osama Bin Laden? Nothing they were born at different times

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Knock Knock Who's there? It is actually not a good idea to say "who's there" to the random person outside. The man could be a robber or a murderer, and will realize a person is inside. He could bomb the door down and do anything to kill you. You should look through the window first, or through the little peep hole. If the person outside is an acquaintance, then you can respond. However it is best to not reply and leave the stranger alone. Safety is key to living a happy joyful life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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