A dyslectic man walks into a bra. It was dark and he didn't see the laundry his wife hanged on the clothes line.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is green and has 4 wheels?... Grass, I lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Chickens live on farms.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is worse then 10 babes nailed to a tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

your mom is so ugly that she was made fun of in highschool so much that she now has social issues and a fear of close relationships which is why she left you and your father at age 5

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do Gary Glitter and Michael Jackson have in common? They are both successful pop stars

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you catch an elephant? Dig a nice deep hole in the ground, and fill it with ashes. Next, line the outside of the hole with peas. When the elephant comes to take a pea, kick it in the ash hole.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why don't you hit a black guy on a bike? because its probably your bike

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What does a frog in a blender sound like? *WWWRRRRRRRBFFFFZZZZZCHWEEERRRRRR*

thumb_up thumb_down -5

a duck, a mexican, a camel, a jew, a duck, a moose, an asian, an ostrich, a turtle, an elephant, a scorpion, two vampires, a pokemon, your mom, Stephen Hawkings, a bird, a plane, mario, your family, and a plumber walk into a bar. They have cancer, AIDS, disabilties, diabetes, herpes, siezures, retardation, death in their families, drug addiction, no arms or legs, no home, no money, racial segregation, and have been raped. A combination of which is worse than the holocaust and three bee stings and a rope that fails.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: What's your favorite song? A: Not one in particular. I like all kinds of music.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the black man do when he walked into the bar? He went up the bartender and bought a beer.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man walks into a bar... who cares what happens after that Charlie Sheen is winning and Osama Bin Laden is dead

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's worse than an hours detention? Gettind raped by a horse anally.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

John and Marry wanted an abortion. God just laughed And Jesus was born Merry Christmas everyone!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Where will you be in twenty years? Celebrating the twentieth anniversary of reading this question... unless you're older than 60, which by modern life expectancy, you'd be dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

a blond and a brunet jump of a bridge who hits the ground first ....... the brunet because the blond has to ask for directions

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do Ping-Pong and Godzilla have in common? Both of them have nothing to do with budhism.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did Madona rub shit on her vagina? Because she was horny.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you get when you put a baby in a blender New Doritos Dip

thumb_up thumb_down -5

I used to be an adventurer like you but then i grew old and i never took i single injury unlike my brother he took an arrow to the knee or so he says i asked him to show me and he was all defensive like "whoa man i don't need to prove anything." so i think he's lieing

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops